Can you really forgive and forget?

When you have been done wrong the first thing people will say I will forgive you but I'm not going to forget. Now I would be lying if I didn't say that the things we experience in life can hurt us deeply especially, if it is more than one time. Certain situations we encounter in life will test human character. We may see certain aspects of someone we never thought existed. In fact, it can be quite ugly. Now we are human, therefore we are imperfect, so we can say things that we don't mean out of anger, fear and frustation. On the other hand, when people are tested certain aspects of thier true personality come out, and it can be devastating when it is people that are close to us such as a spouse, a friend or a parent.

All relationships have the same foundation. Trust, loyalty, honesty and love. Everyone's experience is different. There are varying degrees pain that we can feel that can make it nearly impossible to forgive and forget what they have done. When an indivdual destroys the confidence that you once had in them it will morph your perception of them. However, this is where maturity comes into play. I am not saying that what that person did to you doesn't give you a valid reason to be angry, upset, maybe even bitter. If you need to just scream by all means do so! You are only human. Ask yourself though,do you want to stay in that place forever? In the long run, harboring those feelings will hurt you more than them.

Sometimes we have to separate ourselves from our emotions, cause they cause us to act irrational and make impulsive decisions that could possibly put us in a position to where we need forgiveness. When we chose to forgive, it by no means makes us weak. It makes us stronger. It reflects personal growth and maturity. Think about it as if you are releasing yourself from a cage. You are giving yourself freedom to move on. Now, when you forget, you forget in a sense that you don't call the matter to mind anymore or hold it against them.Especially, if you are still going to have a relationship with such persons. However, you don't forget what you have learned from the experience, so as to not put yourself in those same situations again.

What I have written in this blog is not to belittle anyone's circumstances, cause I don't know any of the facts. Instead, my purpose is to encourge, promote self reflection and growth; that will lead you all to becoming better versions of yourselves. So, can you really forgive and forget yes but the bigger question is will you? Don't let past relationships ruin potentionally good ones in the future. It's completely understandable to develop fear or mistrust of people due to bad experiences, but don't let those experiences that possibly made you callous hold you back from better ones. You have to let it go even if it is hard cause that is the only way in which you can find true peace and happiness.

Nothing but love,

L.A. Noire